HOW TO FENG SHUI FLYING SOLO-WHAT A DAY LOOKS LIKE WHEN DAD IS AWAY

THREE DAYS WITHOUT DAD-WHAT’LL WE DO?  FENG SHUI—!

Zach stuck on the stairs with two of
his favorite kick-it balls

Dad just left.  The house is quiet.  Zach has had three seizures these past two days.  The huge bug eyed monster of “alone” is staring back at me; a bit intimidating.  Zach is stuck and confused, he’s setting on the stairs, it’s almost 1:00 p.m. and he just finished his breakfast; no walk today, no kick it either.  Mom has had no breakfast save three cups of coffee and one jasmine pearl green tea.   Lunch thus far, a handful of sunflower seeds and a banana...

I anticipate this will be an uneventful day, but I’ve imagined that before and things happen; unexpected interruptions and Zach’isms no amount of planning can accommodate.

What I’d like to do; get a cup of tea, read and study, write, watch a movie, concoct some gooey gourmet food, eat chocolate and ice cream, curl up on the couch for a nap, take a nice slow walk in the sunshine and go directly to bed with a good book…Life, on the other hand, has asked me to care for the “least of these” as though he were Christ himself.  This time, I will choose Life rather than be self indulgent; I can care for me in the midst of life lived abundantly.

…An hour later….My gourmet lunch today…it came to consists of cold raw milk poured over Nature’s Path Heritage Flakes.  Rather than hunching over the counter and jamming soup spoonful after scoop into my mouth, I sat at the kitchen bar and ate like a normal person, albeit somewhat ravenously and with milk dripping off the end of my chin.  I had to stop myself, an entire half-gallon of raw milk, as well as a newly opened box of cereal almost vanished...

…At 2:00 p.m., Zach is beginning his bedtime routine.  He, with his very sleepy eyes, is covered up in his freshly changed double bed with a plastic container of foam numbers and letters open before him.  He goes through this routine every night picking just the right number, shape or letter’s to take to bed with him.  Tonight he has reclined to do this very important chore that is usually done hanging off the side of the bed.  Apparently his energy level is on par with mine; not high enough to lean, or hunch.

I will go in and read Zach his bedtime stories soon, he may, or may not finish his very early dinner, watch a movie in bed and fall asleep.  I presume my evening will follow this pattern very closely; although, after consuming such large amounts of cereal, my early dinner may be popcorn popped in coconut oil, topped with sea salt and a fresh, high quality (light-yellow in color) brewers yeast along with…perhaps a few ounces of dark chocolate.

The soundtrack to Anne Of Green Gables is tinkling in the background-I stand at my front door and gaze across our very warm valley on this September day where Extreme Home Makeover is wrapping up yet another marvelous projects for a family in our area with not one, but two biological autistic children, the McPhails.  Now that is some serious feng shui!  I sigh holding my mug of tea, there is a lot of good out there as well as in here.  We are not alone and really nice things happen to brighten life here and there.  A cup of tea, a view and a comfy chair go along way in my world.

After Zach falls asleep, I’d like to think that I will put on my grandmother’s apron and toss together some random ingredients and make myself a "fun healthy for me" meal, pour myself a small glass of wine and treat myself to a quiet simple dish eaten in reflection and solitude and then (if it was tasty) I would post the recipe with this blog.  We’ll see.  I laid awake for three hours last night (raging hot flashes) and then at 1:30 a.m. tended a very post-ictal young man.  I wish I were bionic, but alas, I am wrapped in real flesh with warm blood coursing through my veins.  I pat my, full of Heritage Flakes belly, bed I think won’t come fast enough...

…Three hours later, Zach slid out of bed and is setting on the kitchen floor with his untouched supper, his water cup and the foam toys he picked out; enter the unexpected…he is stuck…will he eat, will bedtime ever come?  Will I get that quiet house ‘er?

6:00 p.m., I hear little rabbit nibbling sounds behind the butcher block…hope springs!…

Fast rabbit, 6:15 he’s done eating.  It’s finally quiet; wish Web were here to enjoy the sunset and a glass of riesling with me.  Pj’s, glasses perched on nose, iced rooibos tea and some reading it is!

Day two…Zach slept till 4:40 a.m., this is a very good miracle!  So it wasn’t 6:00 a.m., it was better than the normal 2:30 a.m.  *I feel rested-I feel good-I feel ready to care as I should*.  The fuel behind this happy dance is that I’m aware how I feel most days.  Thank the living Life for gracing our night with much needed sleep!  Shower for Zach (though I am still in my pj's), meds and supplements in Zach (though my supplements lay on the counter), breakfast made for Zach (no breakie for mom), coffee into me….toy time!

Whatever this day holds, I’m ready to do my part, as Web/Dad teaches a group at Sun River about the powerful meaning of christian marriage.  Thus far the buzz is, it has been well received and just what the body needs to hear.

2:00 p.m.-One hour to the Extreme Home Makeovers “Move That Bus!”  How wonderful for this deserving family!!

3:00 p.m. and they’ve most likely “moved that bus”.  I think I can hear the cheering and tears from my hilltop; perhaps just in Spirit.  Go McPhails!!  Bedtime for Zach.  Those seizures can take a lot out of a young man.  Mom is going to study and write; maybe post this blog.

Second day Foodie in the kitchen, while Zach snores on the couch for two hours.

Southwest Chicken Dip

4 chicken breasts cooled, cooked and shredded, or chopped

1 tsp kosher salt

1/2 cup chopped cilantro

4 green onions chopped

1/2 sweet white onion

1 avocado chopped finely

1 4oz can diced green chilies

1 4oz can shoepeg corn

1 4 oz can mexican corn (or for the canned corn, cut corn off of three ears roasted corn[leave husks in tact, soak ears in a large tub of cold water for 2-6 hours, roast in husk on barbecue.  Peal and cut the corn off of the cob])

DRESSING

1/3 cup soy free Veganaise

1 Lime, juiced

1/2 lemon juiced

dash of cumin

Mix together and serve with gluten free Beanitos corn free chips.  Makes a great light summer meal.

Tomorrow marks day three; four hours of respite, but….oh dear...I have a routine mamo, what an awful way to spend blessed respite hours, but alas it must be done and ’tis better done without a twenty-year-old autistic in tow.  Dad will be home tomorrow!!  I think we did this!


OPTIMALLY WHEN GOING IT ALONE, MY FENG SHUI’ED DESIRES LOOK SOMETHING LIKE THIS—

Kick-it

There would be no seizures.  And one of the days, we would have a long stint of respite care.  I’d call ahead and book myself an hour long massage and a pedicure at spa and schedule lunch at the Dragonfly with my sisters, or a friend.  I would have saved enough money to go to my favorite used clothing store, Avant Garb in Ashland-just to look, or maybe I’d find that desired thing-a pair of black cowgirl boots with flair-then I’d loop my purse over my shoulder and lolly-gag along the streets of the very picturesque pre-autumn sun-filled Ashland, Oregon, with a cup of joe from Noble Coffee.

Zach on his run/walk

chair time

Zach would be happily playing kick-it in the yard with one of his lovely respite care givers.  They would fix him his favorite noon meal (organic hot dogs, pickles and organic strawberries and a banana), take him for his midday walk/run and play toy-toys with him on the couch and read, Winnie The Pooh and Tigger Too, his favorite book.  He would be clapping, bouncing like Tigger and wearing a smile from ear to ear all day long.

After a quick trip to the Ashland Food Coop to snatch up a few of my favorite items, chocolate, salami and cheese, a nice red wine and perhaps a warm freshly baked baguette to go with.  Zach would welcome me home happily and I, I would be glad to be home on our quiet hilltop.  He and I would have some time to play in the yard, me with my sparkling lemonade, before the onset of his bedtime routine.  I’d fix dinner for him and place it on the plate prettily, put him to bed, give him the royal treatment; movie, dinner in bed, books read, a good melon scratch and some time beside him on the pillow, head to head-love pouring from one noggin to the other.

Everyone should have a tea set and a
teatime, or two in their day.

I’d click my ruby red slippers and soothing music would begin, maybe a little Jack Johnson, pour a little boysenberry iced tea into a pretty cup, or perhaps some wine, arrange my, no doubt, colorful dinner on a white stoneware plate while doing a little jig, put on a good chick-flick, or pick up a good book, perhaps thee Good Book and curl up on my very soft brown couch and enjoy a spot of serenity.  I’d hear Zach snoring softly in the monitor.  The house would be very quiet; I’d lock it up and wander up the stairs, climb between two white line dried cotton sheets and Zach and I would sleep till 6:00am without waking.


Feng Shui, what it boils down to-making the best of what we have; we scoot unpleasant out the door and replace it with helpful and pleasant and with the mind, we turn all happenings around till we find the good spot.  Happy’er life!

Coming soon, In Pictures-One Week Feng Shui’ed-Our Family Vacation and a Big Ol’ Mountain Wedding and right on those high heels, The Healing Laughter of Sister Time.

When dark clouds come, how do you Feng Shui that flung pooh?

Drying lavender we picked from
Shasta Lavender Farms.  It now adorns our home with its pungent healing aroma.


Dark days hit us all….It is learning how to feng shui the darkness and distraction, in order that the light might dominate and help reorder, a very full life and keep it on the calmer side, this is a helper to my joy.  It takes mind control (taking every thought captive), which by now, I should be proficient at, but alas, I am still crafting.  For me, it has been learning how to have dominion over useful, but often times dominating distractions such as television and electronics and distracting thoughts (just as God gave Adam and Eve dominion over every living thing in The Garden of Eden [we have the right stuff to do this]).  By “this”  I mean to take these “things” prisoner as it were (sometimes in our minds, where battles rage) and pull them into the spotlight of Truth.  The effect is, rather than being stuffed into a life that feels off, or just not right, a vibrant Life is dumped into my human mold as Light, which colors every corner of my created being.  This gives clarity, to make choices based upon the right information.  For life lived fully; to grow in love towards Him and those around me.  This doesn’t mean that from this point on everything I look at, think about, will be beautiful, but rather, what dominates is indeed shown in its true light and more easily categorized; are my thoughts useful to my situation, or do I need to capture them and bring them into the light.  Some dissipate in The Light and others are revealed and used, or are prayerfully considered in order that they might be dealt with properly.

The dried lavender now hanging
in our home.

Thoughts are things, not random wisps of smoke that vanish (Who Switched Off My Brain, by Dr. Caroline Leaf).  Taking them captive and categorizing themas, helpful,
or destructive is a very valuable thing.  The non-useful, or destructive get erased as we sleep and the useful are exercised and solidified in that same state.  This takes some practice and living in the moment, as they say, as well as being attentive to our thought lives.  When I am in transition from a cloudy spot and dragging my spirit and thoughts into the light-it helps to choose something soothing to help roll the head and heart along to that restorative state.  Music, art or creating something like a blog; reading a positive, or well written book, something creative that links me to The Creator, or meditating on a healing scripture.

Noticing beauty adds light

Restoration is a word I am in love with.  I like to fix run down things and make them beautiful and it takes me a good bit of time to adjust when anything jagged comes into my smooth world, especially if I can’t make it glisten.  Bad news I categorize as broken.  I don’t know why, but it scratches me up, I take it personally.  It takes going to The Giver of Life for the situation and for my own pricked bleeding emotions, that causes my heart to remember why it was created and how it was created.  Only then is the heavy burden eased allowing my life to return to its normal, healthy God centered light, so that I might tend Zach and my family from the positive, the beautiful spaces that lend themselves to healing.  Oh how I love the peace of faith, of knowing the real God who sees all and knows all, who cries, feels and holds His children through difficult times and laughs with us during celebrations!  Our daughter Rachel was just married last weekend and how I felt the smile of God on that union and that event.  I also feel His heart break and tears raining down on Zach’s situation.  He feels, I feel…we are becoming one, He understands me, though I am heartbroken to say, I hardly know the vast, I AM; what an adventure lies ahead.

Life, the Giver thereof keeps my load light and balanced; I start adjusting the weights with things I am picking up along the way and then "whoop-whoop-woah" as my cowboy daddy would say, I’m all over the road with legs of jello.

Heart feeling is how I operate.  I’ve noticed that I seem more pensive than most.  I felt…different growing up.  I was often teased as being a daydreamer, when in fact, everything, every word that came into my world I mulled over and over in my brain like a rock tumbler till it came out smooth and slick.  I have become okay with the fact that God is my manufacturer and this is how He made me to operate.  It has been a help in the way I tend my family, but especially the everyday chore of tending Zach.  I have rounded the corner of my sensitivities by thinking on good things, Philippians 4:8 has been a section of living-salvation for me.  Every situation can be sweetened with positive, helpful thinking.  Thinking on things that are honest, just, and pure and of good report seem to be a much better way to keep ones mind on The Good One and balance ones world in that, "resting in the Arms" position, if you will.  Not that jagged, sour things should never enter our world (we all have difficult things cross our paths), or pray for situations and others who are undergoing hardship, or hurts; that’s body-life, community.  It is the living frame of mind I’m talking about; what I do with darkness, or distraction.  I want a mind and body that work from the riches of God rather than the poverty and depravity of unregenerate man.  Disconnecting, or focusing on the horror of a situation never helped anyone.  Engagement, love and prayer, I have found, are not passive.

Good dwells in the world despite all the bad.  God made us all to operate best from love, to help, to pray, to bring The Light into every situation.  It has been scientifically proven, the human brain and body work best from a place of love, not fear.  I believe I can send that Love and Light through my prayers, because most days it is just little old me and Zach up here on the hilltop.  I pray for and over a situation while changing a diaper, hanging sheets on the line, or plopping dollops of oat/raisin loaded cookie dough onto parchment paper lined sheets-this gives me a great since of satisfaction.  I feel as though I am impacting the situation with rays of Light and Love like some sort of christian cupid.

White sheets drying in the sunshine.

Light enters, while I’m thinking on Goodness, Creation and that kind of Love that human love is only a shadow of.  The kind that cares deeply about the whole person, body, soul and spirit.

Lavender, white sheets hanging in the sunshine and the past two weeks of family and grand babies, a grand high-mountain wedding of a darling daughter, these are some of the good things I have been thinking on today.  His smile and His pleasure always show me the way home.

Sunset Light from Staunton Hill

Try not to light your face with a smile when 

you bite into these babies!

Gluten Free Lemon-Lavender Shortbread Cookies

½ cup pasture butter, softened

1/3 cup coconut palm sugar, or organic cane sugar

4 teaspoons grated organic lemon peel

1 Teaspoon vanilla extract

1 cup Namaste, Perfect Blend flour

2 tablespoons plus 1-1/2 teaspoons non-gmo cornstarch

¼ teaspoon ground mace

1/8 teaspoon salt

1 rounded tablespoon of culinary lavender

Drizzle:

½ cup Confectioners’ sugar

2 to 3 teaspoons lemon juice

Directions

In a small bowl, cream butter and sugar until light and fluffy.  Beat in lemon peel and vanilla.  Combine the flour, cornstarch, mace and salt; gradually add to creamed mixture and mix well.  (Dough will be crumbly.)  Shape into a ball.

On a lightly floured surface, press dough to ½-inch thickness.  Cut with a floured 1-inch fluted cookie cutter; place 1 inch apart on ungreased baking sheets.  Prick cookies with a fork.  Reroll scraps if desired. 

Bake at 350 degrees for 12-15 minutes or until firm.  Cool for 2 minutes before carefully removing to wire racks to cool completely.

Combine confectioners’ sugar and lemon juice; drizzle over cookies